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Musings from the Merse
Friday, June 08, 2007
 
Bagless in Morrisons


'We need some plastic bags' said the wife as she waved me off to Sir Morrisons-strange I thought given her usual aversion to planet destroying materiel but orders is orders. Ask not the reason why etc.

I managed to reach the checkout with only one basket despite some last minute purchases cell phoned from Hutton as I was frantically combing the shelves for organic tinned tomatoes and Antique Organic Cheddar (had to settle for 'very mature')At the checkout I found the plastic bag container empty. 'Could I have a couple of bags please?' I asked the dragon in charge.' Plastic bags?!' she screamed-'Don't you know the damage they do to the environment? Please consider your duty to mankind! Where is your bag for life? I confessed I had left it behind (the one the wife loves made by disabled organically fed Filipino single mothers in a healthy working environment)
'Getting forgetful are we? Anyhow it is not our policy to give away plastic bags. Can't you carry them as they are?' I plainly couldn't- six grapefruit and several organic apples, inter alia, being beyond my juggling abilities.

The check out lady sighed deeply and pressed a button. A magnified pre-recorded message bellowed around the store; ' ATTENTION CUSTOMERS! A PERSON HAS ASKED FOR TWO PLASTIC BAGS AT CHECKOUT NUMBER EIGHT. WOULD YOU LIKE TO LET THE PERSON KNOW WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT THIS ESPECIALLY DURING A G8 SUMMIT FOCUSED ON ENVIRONMENTAL ISSUES. ITS GREEN TO SHOP AT MORRISON'S'

After a moment of stunned silence a mob headed our way headed by large hairy women, tattooed, and brandishing, menacingly, buy-one-get-one-free gigantic caravan-family size Coke bottles.



I really must stop having dreams like that.
 
Comments:
As Martin Luther King said...

I have a dream that one day, down in Berwick, with its rapacious campers, with its premier food outlet having his aisles dripping with TV dinners and BOGOF pies; one day right there in Berwick, little old ladies and other sundry normal people will be able to join hands with campers as brothers and sisters and be able to buy that organic zucchini pate, the sun-dried tomatoes and a cheeky little Chateau Le Chasseur 1962 and get a recyclable bag to take it home all home in without leaving Sir Morrisons' rococo portals.

Then again perhaps not.
 
Yes, Martin Luther King was a Sainsbury's customer.
 
Perhaps he'll change his name to Martin Luther Kelso then - subject to SBC planning approval of course.
 
Too funny! After a one day UK visit I noticed that Sainsbury's now have thin plastic bags. You need double the number than with the old, thicker ones, because they're so weak and even then they barely make it home. On top of that, you're supposed to reuse them...
 
You came all the way from Egypt to the UK-for one day-and spent it in Sainsbury's.

Thats dedication for you.

Whats wrong with Simon Artz in Port Said?

Or the Giza Tesco?
 
So the Berwick Advertiser is screaming "It's official - we're getting an M&S" - seemingly in the old KwikSave at Tweed Sawmills (ie. next to Homebase) - so Berwick and district can get not just food, but far more expensive than it should be food
 
Thats 'progress' for you
 
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