The wife is on her way to Foreign Parts and Huttonian faces nearly three weeks of unassisted domestic tasks. Shopping is the easy bit much improved by Morrisons (The Artists formerly known as Safeways) with everything-you-can-get-into-one basket-checkout-rule. As long as you can get there by 8am you will miss the caravanners and their anti-social shopping habits of lane crowding, fag end dropping, trolley arging and wrong checkout blocking. It is also a good time to fill up with petrol with your Morrisons buy 10,000 litres and get a £5 shopping voucher sometime next year scheme. I was slightly frustrated by a motor caravan(not a local camper) behind whom I queued assuming (as the cab was empty) that he was paying and about to be on his way only to discover after 10 minutes that if he was paying it was in the main store and had left his vehicle convenienty parked beside the pumps whilst he shopped for his months beer and groceries. It was my day for getting the neighbours Daily Mail and was back in the car when I discovered that it was the Scottish edition which they dislike and which to day was indistinguishablee from its English stablemate apart from the little red lettering 'Scottish edition'. So I had to take it back and exchange it for the south of the border one in case they felt they were being robbed of real news as opposed to the Mc Rubbish.
So now it is feed the birds -a four dish menu, keep the blackbirds away from the strawberries, the butterflies-cabbage white- from the broccoli or is it the brussel sprouts?-water and organically feed the tomatoes, weed the pond of erotic* plants , carry on removing grass from the drive-painting the Forth Bridge sort of task, hang out the washing and by that time all that is done it will be nearly the moment to think about the kitchen work-the wife has left me a daily menu in case I am tempted to stick to boiled eggs and sardines. Never a free moment.
*exotic surely? Blog-ed
