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Musings from the Merse
Saturday, October 22, 2005
 
Man, Machinery and Morrisons. The struggle continues

I did the wife a favour by accompanying her to Sir Morrison's for a spot of welcome home shopping. Friday afternoon is not a great time, especially when it is foully wet and there is nothing else to do in Berwick. Obviously Customer Relations (Crumblies Division) have been warned about the erratic behaviour of old persons bewildered by the stores cutting edge technology. Emboldened by Huttonian's triumphs with make it yourself Latte we decided to go for tea and some' still fresh' (claimed Morison's) well reduced pastries. But first we had to park our trolley in the special high security self locking lockers so as not to block the aisles in the caff. The Wife wrestling unsuccessfully with stage one: unlock empty locker-the essential fiirst step in a four stage process (one more than launching a rocket from Cape Kennedy so being a rocket scientist does not really help) was pounced upon by the female warder from CR (CD) who showed that brute strength rather than finesse is the secret of locker technology and with one shrewd blow from a massive fore arm managed all four stages simultaneously this imprisoning the space capsule securely whilst the old folks could enjoy their tea. The tea machine was a comparative doddle although you could not, unlike the Latte, get it a cup at a time-the water would only flow into a small pot in which a tea bag a]had been prepositioned by one of the good elves in the food resource and processing area aka the kitchen. The button for the hot water worked perfectly and we required no assistance from the handmaiden.

Flushed with our technical triumphs opening the secure locker was a pushover and we wheeled our empty capsule into the store getting an admiring nod and a small standing ovation from the good folks in Customer Relations as we passed. One seemed to be saying some thing to the other about Old Dogs and New Tricks but I am sure it was kindly meant and proves that some of these old saws are actually rubbish.

I was told this morning by a shop keeper in Berwick that he had heard that Sir Morrison's 'Terrace Cafe'-more appropriately CarPark View had been closed today for 'refurbrishment' and 'fine tuning' Perhaps the Egg Boiler is on the blink or the Walking Dead have taken a dreadful revenge on the Latte machine when the folks in Customer Relations (CD) had their backs turned. As long as there is no attempt to pin it on me and the wife....
 
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