Musings from the Merse
Monday, May 15, 2006
Again in Ould Reekie for a hopefully pain free visit to the dentist-except of course for the wallet which will have much specie removed. Knowing the reluctance of GNER crews to arise early on Mondays especially after a week end of inconvenience regretted as rails are torn up between Newcastle and York and some times put back upside down (Hence the 'wrong type of rail on track' excuse) Huttonian decided to catch the train before the usual one which in itself is the train before the most convenient one, timetable wise.
I need n't have bothered to disturb the Sparrows as all trains were 'currently on time' and the 9.28 was only three minutes late as the driver had needed very briefly to use an off train facility at York Station. I suspect the on board relieveries were their usual noisome selves and taken out of service one by one as the train hurtled northwards as 'a convenience to other customers' who usually have a choice between holding their noses or crossing their legs. The new GNER rolling stock have state of the art post modern loos in Dr Who like capsules so technically advanced that you need a first degree in electronic engineering to get in and a Masters in computer studies to get out. Thus ensuring that the expression 'convenience' is the new oxymoron.
I was in the old fashioned type of rolling stock and spent most of the journey wondering at the notice beside the seat near a three pin plug and switch which said' Laptops and Mobile phones only'. What else? A steam iron perhaps for pressing your Kilt in situ in preparation for a job interview with the Scottish Executive-the last bastion of the well dressed man/woman. For a personal vibrator? (Batteries not provided) Too public I would have thought. An Espresso Coffee machine?A retro Black and White TV; charging a small weapon of mass destruction to be launched at Dunbar Station?. The mind is boggling all the way to the next 'station stop'
I descended to yet another misleading announcement-an art in which GNER leads the world. Customers (where have passengers gone?) are asked to keep their tickets with them as Waverley Station has electronic ticket barriers' Much fumbling in pockets, wallets and frantic scrambling in waste bins. Not a barrier in sight, needless to add.
The Cyber Cafe is empty of Russian academics, Mossad agents and early Japanese Bag Pipe avoiders. Looks like being a boring day. And, oh yes, its hissing down outside.
I need n't have bothered to disturb the Sparrows as all trains were 'currently on time' and the 9.28 was only three minutes late as the driver had needed very briefly to use an off train facility at York Station. I suspect the on board relieveries were their usual noisome selves and taken out of service one by one as the train hurtled northwards as 'a convenience to other customers' who usually have a choice between holding their noses or crossing their legs. The new GNER rolling stock have state of the art post modern loos in Dr Who like capsules so technically advanced that you need a first degree in electronic engineering to get in and a Masters in computer studies to get out. Thus ensuring that the expression 'convenience' is the new oxymoron.
I was in the old fashioned type of rolling stock and spent most of the journey wondering at the notice beside the seat near a three pin plug and switch which said' Laptops and Mobile phones only'. What else? A steam iron perhaps for pressing your Kilt in situ in preparation for a job interview with the Scottish Executive-the last bastion of the well dressed man/woman. For a personal vibrator? (Batteries not provided) Too public I would have thought. An Espresso Coffee machine?A retro Black and White TV; charging a small weapon of mass destruction to be launched at Dunbar Station?. The mind is boggling all the way to the next 'station stop'
I descended to yet another misleading announcement-an art in which GNER leads the world. Customers (where have passengers gone?) are asked to keep their tickets with them as Waverley Station has electronic ticket barriers' Much fumbling in pockets, wallets and frantic scrambling in waste bins. Not a barrier in sight, needless to add.
The Cyber Cafe is empty of Russian academics, Mossad agents and early Japanese Bag Pipe avoiders. Looks like being a boring day. And, oh yes, its hissing down outside.
Comments:
The barriers are exclusively on the Western & Fife suburban services platforms, and not on the mainline platforms (nor the North Berwick line) - at least they were last time I passed through Waverley.
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