Today on Radio 4 (no Huttonian was not involved) carried an item about a Radio 4 reporter trying to smuggle a garden gnome into the Chelsea Flower Festival. But the rather snobby 'culture' of the event was against him. Garden Gnomes are actually banned under the regulations for the event. So no luck-out it had to go again. Huttonian lacks a 'feature' for the garden in the Old Manse since the rather tasteful pedestal for our sun dial we had inherited disintergrated in the Mersian dreich. Plastic Gnomes would be more weather tolerant if a bit obtrusive on the eye first thing in the morning when viewing the vast sweep of our front meadow aka the lawn from the commanding heights of the bathroom window. Hutton does not seem to have an entrenched gnome community but it may of course have had one once before the formation of the LFGG-see BBC story below. No we need something more imaginative and in the best possible taste -something which would raise no hackles in Chelsea or indeed in Alnwick. *
France a shadowy organisation calling itself The Liberation Front for Garden Gnomes has struck again.
Seventy-four gnomes have been found laid out in front of the cathedral in the eastern French town of Saint-Die.
Summer is here, and with it, the group's focus on rescuing seemingly trapped gnomes.
For the police this is an increasingly wearisome annual event.
'De-ridiculising' the gnomes
For several years now, this has been the season for The Liberation Front for Garden Gnomes to re-dedicate itself to the task of purloining pottery manikins from unsuspecting suburban lawns.
In the words of its literature, the group then works on "de-ridiculising the figurines by placing them back in their natural environment".
This normally means woodland groves, but occasionally activists choose more photo-friendly settings, such as the cathedral concourse in Saint-Die.
This was the second spectacular in two days. More than 100 gnomes were found on Tuesday, in woods also in the Vosges region, and across the country householders are reporting thefts daily.
For the police the joke is wearing distinctly thin.
They have to treat every disappearance seriously because as one spokesman put it many people, especially the elderly, are actually very attached to their garden gnomes.
The Liberation Front for Garden Gnomes* I have in norn iron a present from one of the daughters which might be just the thing-a large green plastic frog which farts in a most realistic way when it is approached. It is striking and also useful as I am sure it would see off a neighbours dogs which roam free and leave large mementoes of their visit in most inconvenient places.
But I better ask the wife
