Musings from the Merse
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Casting the Die? The Borders Welcomes You
The Scottish Borders Council produces an occasional news sheet:- SBC Connect to inform the populace how well it is doing-'A Bright Future for the Borders' is this quarter's big story. Its a wish list for the newly elected administration following the May elections.Including such visions as :' Defend the character of the Borders by raising standards of building design including renewable requirements' (Use of mud?) and that ever green vote catcher : ' War on Dog Fouling-with more wardens and bins' (How about 'less dogs' as a more workable policy?) Good news for Fishwick is ' Improve safety measures on the main arterial A routes' and a rather weird commitment: 'Develop a Borders Rural Development Strategy with "rural proofing". What does this mean. We have an ancient damp proof system on the Old Manse. Do we now have to add a Rural Proof' one as well? And what will it do? Protect us from bovine intrusions? Crazed starlings? Can a Highheidyin please elucidate?
Inside SBC Connect there is publicity about making the Borders a marriage location. It is already one for Borderers but the idea is to bring in the huddled masses yearning to be hitched up, ('Free' is hardly appropriate) in such romantic surroundings as the Marriage Room in Coldstream Town Hall Don't miss: www.coldstreamweddings.co.uk.
Not mentioned anywhere in Borders Connect is the Hutton Think Tank's project to make the Borders the Funeral Hotspot of Great Britain, Northern Ireland and Berwick upon Tweed. As a result of 'thinking outside the box' (no pun intended) HTT has various packages under consideration: 'Natural' Woodland Burials (Coffins from recyclable copies of the Berwickshire, Self igniting tyre fed Pyres, renewable Towers of Silence, Organic Sutee Spots-all from the ordinary to the exotic could be offered here in our notorious peace and tranquility. Bury One-inter (or burn) one free (usual conditions apply including a five year offer limitation) It would all help with our expansion of tourism strategies on which SBC and VisitScotland are continuously engaged.
And a new slogan perhaps:
The Borders. Scotland's Favourite Final Stop Destination
At your last Gasp? Head for Hawick!
The Scottish Borders Council produces an occasional news sheet:- SBC Connect to inform the populace how well it is doing-'A Bright Future for the Borders' is this quarter's big story. Its a wish list for the newly elected administration following the May elections.Including such visions as :' Defend the character of the Borders by raising standards of building design including renewable requirements' (Use of mud?) and that ever green vote catcher : ' War on Dog Fouling-with more wardens and bins' (How about 'less dogs' as a more workable policy?) Good news for Fishwick is ' Improve safety measures on the main arterial A routes' and a rather weird commitment: 'Develop a Borders Rural Development Strategy with "rural proofing". What does this mean. We have an ancient damp proof system on the Old Manse. Do we now have to add a Rural Proof' one as well? And what will it do? Protect us from bovine intrusions? Crazed starlings? Can a Highheidyin please elucidate?
Inside SBC Connect there is publicity about making the Borders a marriage location. It is already one for Borderers but the idea is to bring in the huddled masses yearning to be hitched up, ('Free' is hardly appropriate) in such romantic surroundings as the Marriage Room in Coldstream Town Hall Don't miss: www.coldstreamweddings.co.uk.
Not mentioned anywhere in Borders Connect is the Hutton Think Tank's project to make the Borders the Funeral Hotspot of Great Britain, Northern Ireland and Berwick upon Tweed. As a result of 'thinking outside the box' (no pun intended) HTT has various packages under consideration: 'Natural' Woodland Burials (Coffins from recyclable copies of the Berwickshire, Self igniting tyre fed Pyres, renewable Towers of Silence, Organic Sutee Spots-all from the ordinary to the exotic could be offered here in our notorious peace and tranquility. Bury One-inter (or burn) one free (usual conditions apply including a five year offer limitation) It would all help with our expansion of tourism strategies on which SBC and VisitScotland are continuously engaged.
And a new slogan perhaps:
The Borders. Scotland's Favourite Final Stop Destination
At your last Gasp? Head for Hawick!
Comments:
Indeed. 'Short Break' means twenty minutes at the Hirsel Tea Rooms or a visit to a convenient bush after two much Coke at Macdonalds.
That should of course be too much Coke. And I don't really blame the through putters for the bush with exorbitant loo charges in Berwickshire. Scotland's favourite cross legged destination
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