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Musings from the Merse
Saturday, July 04, 2009
 
DUNS DINGS A'. BUT BE CAREFUL

Duns Summer Festival or Reiver's Week starts tomorrow with the Kirkin' O' Reiver and the Openin' Ceremony (Swallow your most of your final consonants and you are speakin' correc' loca' lingo)The very attractive Festival Programme is out and amidst the historical articles, poetry and programme lurk a sense of possible impending disaster or civil disorder. The Family Cycle Run ( British safety standard helmets must be worn, take part at your own risk) Family Ceilidh (Participants must be accompanied by an over 18 year old) Family Fun Day (cancelled if weather bad) Five-a -side- Football (Participants take part at own risk) Gymkhana (Participants etc) Reiver's Dinner and Ball (Strictly over 18's only)Fun Run (Yes, at own risk) Hand Ba' ( In case of damage property owners in the vicinity of the of Market Square may care to board their ground floor windows...dangerous nature of the Hand Ba' ..children are not to be left unattended)


Its a relief that apparently the Teddy Bear's Picnic and the Tea Dance are risk free and , surprisingly, the same applies to the DUNS GOT TALENT event. But the most striking (Npi) plea for good order and military discipline is connected to the Bed race on Monday evening

Competitors take part at their own risk

A risky bed race? Really?

The clue lies in the large print at the bottom of the page

PLEASE DO NOT THROW MISSILES AT THE COMPETITORS

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Comments:
An' I thought a' the flags were up to welcome me....
 
Up to a point
 
Duns is a truly European toon with all this EEC-style regard to health and safety. Now what about that strange footballish game played with the Englishman's heid - which acts might be grought to bear?
 
Race Relations Act (Revise 2008);
Country Pursuits, Control Of (XXVI Cap 2, 2007);UN GA Resolution 3421 (1997) 'Cruel and Unusual Practices-sub section21 : Minimalist Genocide.'; EU Protection of Endangered Species (English Persons)
Cap 2 Point Deux 2007; SBC (1987). Control of unusual Missiles in a Public Place; Discouragement of Headbanging (Heads-separate from Neck) Berwickshire High School; out of school deportment and etiquette for Sixth Formers, 1978, revised 1979, abandoned 1980-to mention just a few
 
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