Vandals are at the gates.And'won't stop.
According to an article in the New Statesman, reprinted in a recent ‘The Week’ about the science of Quirkology, one demographic group ‘Van Drivers’ are more likely than any one else to ‘push boundaries and break rules’ Now, there is a glimpse of the bleeding obvious I hear you cry. But hold on-its not just van drivers but women van drivers-Cor! Stone the sparrows! (we lack surplus crows around here) A think tank in the US has shown, for example that, sub species 12 c :WVD (not too far removed from WMD, we note in parenthesis) are particularly prone to break the speed limit-96% as opposed to 86% of male VDs. And when approaching a T-junction 99% WVDs fail to stop completely-Men mind you not far behind at 94%.And if they don't they presumably drive into the back of the one WVD immediately in front who did stop. Well, one should not be too surprised: that is standard van driver behaviour and especially White Vans are, er, in the van in this respect.
But Dr Trinkaus, the author of this seminal (no pun intended) study on the distaff driver has found that WVDs, away from the road also behave badly and are more prone than any one else to cheat in the TEN TIMES OR FEWER ITEMS check outs at supermarkets. Of cheats identified stuffing their trolleys with 11 items or more or taking through two loaded with ten each, 80% were WVDs taking a break from causing multiple pileups at the nearest T-junction.
This is a report based on New York research. This side of the pond I suspect that on the one basket or ten items check outs at Sir Morrisons WVDs are well down the list and can on no way compare with HTCs-Heavily Tattooed Caravanners. But they do have gender in common-Male caravanners, generally have less tattoos and better manners. The wimps.
And as for T-junctions-me, I’d prefer to face off a WVD than a HTC in charge of her Kommer Highwaywoman at any time-indicating right, turning left and dumping a Big Mac carton at the same time. As for coming to a complete stop?
Don’t be so silly.
The blog will be braving white vans tomorrow on a trip to southern (well north Midland) parts. Normal service Sunday.
If we are spared.
Labels: Sir Morrison's, White Van Drivers, Women Van Drivers