Musings from the Merse
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Dogged does it
At the (fairly) recent Scottish Border council elections most candidates pledged to do more about dealing with the mountains of dog poo which besmirch our villages and sure enough a plan of action was pledged in the aims of the new administration. A 'vision' rather than a plan of action in councilspeak. This pome(?) by a local bard is seemingly based on a vision-poppy/puppy induced? Who knows. I am advised that although considered by some as possible line of action it was never actually implemented. A pity.
The Hutton Solution
‘ The Notice reads:
'Dogs who offend will be shot’
and in smaller letters:
‘Owners of offending dogs.
You have been warned!’
‘That should do the trick’
said the large man
with a baseball hat’.
putting another shell
into his shotgun.
stepping carefully over
the spent cartridges
and
the corpses
There were some dead dogs
as well.
‘I sometimes think
that the chairman
of the Community Council
takes his duties too seriously’
said
the lady with the pooper scooter
and the bullet proof
vest.
NB very carefully. The chairman of the community council thus depicted must have been well before Huttonian's time
At the (fairly) recent Scottish Border council elections most candidates pledged to do more about dealing with the mountains of dog poo which besmirch our villages and sure enough a plan of action was pledged in the aims of the new administration. A 'vision' rather than a plan of action in councilspeak. This pome(?) by a local bard is seemingly based on a vision-poppy/puppy induced? Who knows. I am advised that although considered by some as possible line of action it was never actually implemented. A pity.
The Hutton Solution
‘ The Notice reads:
'Dogs who offend will be shot’
and in smaller letters:
‘Owners of offending dogs.
You have been warned!’
‘That should do the trick’
said the large man
with a baseball hat’.
putting another shell
into his shotgun.
stepping carefully over
the spent cartridges
and
the corpses
There were some dead dogs
as well.
‘I sometimes think
that the chairman
of the Community Council
takes his duties too seriously’
said
the lady with the pooper scooter
and the bullet proof
vest.
NB very carefully. The chairman of the community council thus depicted must have been well before Huttonian's time
Labels: Dog Poo, Hutton, Local Elections, Merse
Comments:
Is the bullet-proof lady's transport a 2 wheeled motorised velocipede running on a new bio fuel?
# posted by 
: 11:52 AM
: 11:52 AM
Well spotted as the Berwick man said to the over flying seagull. Hutton Think Tank (Poetry and prose section) assure me that the original version is of course 'Pooper Scooper'but you maay be on to something-suggest contact Patents Office before anyone else has a similar invention in mind
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