Musings from the Merse
Saturday, September 26, 2009
(Dog) CRAP TOWNS REVISITED
Huttonian is loathe to return to this distasteful(npi) topic but it is No 1 worry in the community (dis)satisfaction survey recently published by the Scottish Borders Council and every time I go to Spitall-Northumberland's most depressing seaside holiday destination-known to many as The Last Resort-I think of Dog Poo.
Ostensibly the City Fathers are doing some thing about it-hence the rather fierce warnings but to what effect? Has anyone been fined a thousand quid? I doubt it. Spitall is where dog owners go before they die and they are thick on the ground. And it is not just one man one dog; its lots of dogs per person. Yesterday I saw a guy with four dogs on four leads; between his fingers on one hand as well as two leads he was clutching a small transparent plastic bag. One smoldering turd, fast asleep, lay within it. Good man. But how did it get there? Put there before he left home to show willing, one suspects. There was no way he could hold onto all his curs and scoop up an offering to bag it-and sure enough as we followed his progress there was evidence of fresh droppings; reminiscent of marking the elephants progress in New York every 17 March but the St Patrick's Day Parade Marshalls had armies of clean up Crap Collectors, with scoops to follow the parade and do the needful.
Verb Sap: the only safe place to walk in Spitall without having to dance the Northumberland Two Step: Do Do, Do Do, Do is on the beach. close to the sea, at low tide.
On a Monday Morning.
2AM
Labels: Crap Towns, Dog Poo, Spitall
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
GOING TO THE DOGS
As the Berwickshire feverishly searches for new 'Issues' to titivate its readership it has now found one that is sure to attract a large yes vote.
So far so good:
Should stronger action be taken to control dog fouling in public places?
Yes [100%]
No [0%]
Don't Know [0%]
Of course not many people will read the real question which is about 'stronger action' as the gut feeling is that dog fouling is so. er, foul something must be done perhaps ignoring that there are quite a raft of measures already in place-hefty fines, dog wardens, much publicity and a general public attitude of intolerance towards incontinent dogs. Although very few Borderers will actually risk confrontation by tackling an offending dog owner direct. Go home muttering and write to the Berwickshire, yes, tell the big burly man walking his whippet to bag the filth, no.
And what is stronger action?
The question needs to be rephrased
"Do you support persistently offending dog owners being put up against a tree or lamppost and shot? "
A bit harsh in this day and age and unlikely to attract more than a 60% yes vote
Think out side the box. Or sand tray. Its the dogs who crap, not the owners. Shift the onus. Bring back the licensing of dogs (Give underused rural post offices some thing to do) and no cur would be allowed in a public place unless certified Eco Friendly. If a dog can be taught to come to heel, sit, round up sheep, beg,, die for daddy,get the paper, nick golf balls it surely can be taught not to crap outside its own premises.
So if dog poo continues to be a problem once the necessary legislation and certification then you know who you are looking for.
The Dog.
Remove 'owners' from the above rephrased issue.
You would get as big a yes vote as reopening Reston Station got a no And the Berwickshire could move on to (clean) pastures fresh and issues new
As the Berwickshire feverishly searches for new 'Issues' to titivate its readership it has now found one that is sure to attract a large yes vote.
So far so good:
Should stronger action be taken to control dog fouling in public places?
Yes [100%]
No [0%]
Don't Know [0%]
Of course not many people will read the real question which is about 'stronger action' as the gut feeling is that dog fouling is so. er, foul something must be done perhaps ignoring that there are quite a raft of measures already in place-hefty fines, dog wardens, much publicity and a general public attitude of intolerance towards incontinent dogs. Although very few Borderers will actually risk confrontation by tackling an offending dog owner direct. Go home muttering and write to the Berwickshire, yes, tell the big burly man walking his whippet to bag the filth, no.
And what is stronger action?
The question needs to be rephrased
"Do you support persistently offending dog owners being put up against a tree or lamppost and shot? "
A bit harsh in this day and age and unlikely to attract more than a 60% yes vote
Think out side the box. Or sand tray. Its the dogs who crap, not the owners. Shift the onus. Bring back the licensing of dogs (Give underused rural post offices some thing to do) and no cur would be allowed in a public place unless certified Eco Friendly. If a dog can be taught to come to heel, sit, round up sheep, beg,, die for daddy,get the paper, nick golf balls it surely can be taught not to crap outside its own premises.
So if dog poo continues to be a problem once the necessary legislation and certification then you know who you are looking for.
The Dog.
Remove 'owners' from the above rephrased issue.
You would get as big a yes vote as reopening Reston Station got a no And the Berwickshire could move on to (clean) pastures fresh and issues new
Labels: Dirty Dogs., Dog owners, Dog Poo
Sunday, July 26, 2009
No Winnie but lots of Pooh
Sunday's Guest column is contributed by a regular bloggee
Love Thy Neighbour.
I abhor the pair next door.
Their dog quartet's disgusting.
These pesky hounds befoul the grounds
The patio encrusting.
They never take their dogs for walks
Or play with them at all.
They're left alone for hours and hours
With not a toy to maul.
All through the night they bark and bark
So sleep is all forgotten.
A way to treat your neighbours?
I call that pretty rotten.
On Sundays do they disappear
To go unto the kirk
To top up their self-righteousness
With such a sleekit smirk.
Love thy neighbour's not a thing
The practise any week
So the rest of us are Christians who turn the other cheek.
And now, hurrah,they've all moved on
Fresh pastures for to smear
And just a pile of doggy poop
To tell us they lived here.
Apologies to Thomas Hood.
Sunday's Guest column is contributed by a regular bloggee
Love Thy Neighbour.
I abhor the pair next door.
Their dog quartet's disgusting.
These pesky hounds befoul the grounds
The patio encrusting.
They never take their dogs for walks
Or play with them at all.
They're left alone for hours and hours
With not a toy to maul.
All through the night they bark and bark
So sleep is all forgotten.
A way to treat your neighbours?
I call that pretty rotten.
On Sundays do they disappear
To go unto the kirk
To top up their self-righteousness
With such a sleekit smirk.
Love thy neighbour's not a thing
The practise any week
So the rest of us are Christians who turn the other cheek.
And now, hurrah,they've all moved on
Fresh pastures for to smear
And just a pile of doggy poop
To tell us they lived here.
Apologies to Thomas Hood.
Labels: Dog Poo, Pissing off the Neighbours
Thursday, April 02, 2009
DOG OWNERS WARNED TO CLEAN UP THEIR ACT
howls the banner headline in today's Berwickshire with the titivating sub heading that the Scottish Borders ''Local Team' cleans up 335 pieces of dog dirt in Coldstream in just one steamy day*. Gory details here
Coldstream seems to have been a particular target for the Dog Warden's squad as they 'rapid response' the 'First Toon in Scotland' (Or the last depending on direction of travel) The story relates that some one fed up with excreta smeared footwear is hitting back with poisoned pellets which is a trifle OTT (Misguided says the Berwickshire) perhaps.
I don't think we have such a problem in canine anal retentive Duns. There are no statistics on the number of dog owners in Duns out of the 5,205 who were formally warned of their responsibilities in the Borders in the last 8 months in 2008. Most of the local dogs seem to enjoy their walkies in Duns Castle Park beside the well named Hen Poo lake-although it is the Ducks (rather than Hens) and the Geese which are responsible for most of the droppings encountered on this road.
I would be interested to see a similar breakdown (npi) of Dog crap in Spitall. The DP capital of northern Northumberland. With all this talk of international cooperation here is a splendid opportunity for a bit of technical assistance from good neighbours in Berwickshire.Plastic bags and fixed penalties across the Border, sort of thing
Thanks to flickr for the image. No sure from where
* Who is counting? They are apparently
Labels: Coldstream, Dog Poo, Dog Waste, Spitall
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Spitall looked a bit like this yesterday in the faux Spring. We once considered relocating from Hutton to here but a major factor on not doing so was the huge number of dogs (rarely see one walker with only one cur) and therefore the piles of 'waste' (as the notices call the crap) where ever you go. Not even safe on the beach below the tide mark. You can't see the excrement from here but believe me, it is there. Either in situ or lovingly placed in a plastic bag and then left abandoned for the careless shoe.
And the other thing I find unattractive about this rather faded seaside resort are the numerous unfriendly notices on people's gates prohibiting parking, turning your car or possibly breathing through your mouth. If they are ignored as the anti Dog Fouling posters then I have some sympathy with the householders. But the whole thrust is 'move on, Jimmy. We don't want your sort here'
The other image is of a Spitall Gate notice. I am not sure what it means. If you don't close the gate
we might escape?
Labels: Dog Poo, Spitall, Unfriendly notices.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Two images eluded me in Hutton: Low flying aircraft caught in the act at undr 200 feet and unretentive dogs. But an occasional bloggee has helped out with the latter. I wonder if this was Spittal beach? Certainly not Hutton but it will do as an interesting image.
What an entry for the family album
And if the photographer noticed the backing group (npi) was the decent thing done? One assumes it was the photographer's dog.
Or as so often in Spittal was it left to the tide to do the pooping?
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Winning The Pooh?
This letter to the Berwickshire:
SIR - I read with interest the regular correspondence regarding dog fouling across the Borders.
My team and I have been working hard to get the message through to everyone that dog fouling will not be tolerated.
Part of the publicity/awareness campaign has involved the team putting up around 200 posters reminding dog owners of their obligations and providing contact information for people to ask questions or report offenders.
In the past few weeks, a large percentage of the posters have been ripped down in the Chirnside and Swinton area.
This means that tax payers’ money and council staff time has been wasted.
We would ask the parties involved to please stop destroying these posters.
I would also ask anyone with an issue about dog fouling to contact us on 0800 376 1030 to discuss it.
PHIL PARRANS,
Senior Dog Warden
is indicative of how dog fouling remains one of the main issues in rural villages, not just in the Merse but throughout the UK. Much noise and heat is generated at Community Council meetings with most people supportive of attempts to reduce the Berwickshire crap mountain. So one wonders what the problem in Chirnside and Swinton with posters being torn down? Are thes anal rtentive dog owners (the orifice pertaining to the canine, not the owner) fed up with constant unnecesary admonitions?
Or local anarchists. And if you don't approve of this anti poo campaign what arguments can you deploy on 0800 876 1030 to convince the Crap Czar to lay off?
Perhaps A Peasant can shed some light?
At risk of overkill I repeat a post of some years ago:
Dogged does it
At the (fairly) recent Scottish Border council elections most candidates pledged to do more about dealing with the mountains of dog poo which besmirch our villages and sure enough a plan of action was pledged in the aims of the new administration. A 'vision' rather than a plan of action in councilspeak. This pome(?) by a local bard is seemingly based on a vision-poppy/puppy induced? Who knows. I am advised that although considered by some as possible line of action it was never actually implemented. A pity.
The Hutton Solution
‘ The Notice reads:
'Dogs who offend will be shot’
and in smaller letters:
‘Owners of offending dogs.
You have been warned!’
‘That should do the trick’
said the large man
with a baseball hat’.
putting another shell
into his shotgun.
stepping carefully over
the spent cartridges
and
the corpses
There were some dead dogs
as well.
‘I sometimes think
that the chairman
of the Community Council
takes his duties too seriously’
said
the lady with the pooper scooter
and the bullet proof
vest.
NB very carefully. The chairman of the community council thus depicted must have been well before Huttonian's time
The image is obviously to encourage the responsible disposal of poo while it is still fresh and steaming. Worth trying in Whitsome? But perhaps put it into Gallic rather than Welsh?
Labels: Berwickshire, Dog Poo, Hutton, Whitsome
Friday, February 06, 2009
Huttonian only rarely reads the Berwick Advertiser as the world it reports on although only 15 miles or so from Duns and less than 7 from down town Hutton it might well be on a different planet as far as news and 'issues' are concerned. Its letter column, always a good indicator of what the lunatic fringe is up to carried this gem :
SIR,-As neither our council nor our overstretched blue thin line seem to be able to rid our public areas of intimidating groups of alcoholics and drug addicts, who appear to flaunt local bylaws with relative impunity, may I be permitted to offer a solution?
My thoughts are that we should, perhaps through public subscription, purchase a water cannon.
I for one would volunteer to be trained on such a vehicle and I am sure the dog warden would be right there with me.
The use of this vehicle, which would supplement the refuse cart, on a regular basis would go some way to resolving the problem.
Not only that, we could also tackle dog and seagull deposits at the same time and perhaps loosen chewing gum on the pavements, particularly at the 'methazone' (Boots forecourt)!
If, as I suspect, the above is considered too cost prohibitive in today's current financial climate and/or a tad too politically incorrect, then can I suggest a cheaper alternative?
We could designate a dedicated area where these morons could congregate (the low water mark at Spittal beach just before a spring tide springs to mind) and place at their disposal their very own recycling apparatus by way of a bottle/can bank, sharps bin and mega skip!
Seriously though. I ask the question.
Is it really beyond our collective wit to rid our parks and beauty spots of these non contributing low life before they (the former) all become permanent ‘no go’ areas for townsfolk and visitors alike?
Is this really so OTT? Could Duns get like this? As for Hutton,the Think Tank believes there is a certain resonance: The CEO (HT2) points out that if it was known the first dog owner who permits his pet to defecate in a public place would be swept away by a water cannon, together with animal and deposit, what a marvelous deterrent that would be. The Community Council is to be addressed by the Dog Poo Highheidyin-or Crap Czar, at its next meeting so here may well be a idea worth putting forward.
(The image is of a mini water cannon, child operated to minimise costs. Three of these on the Hutton main street and a handful more on the walks around the village would soon raise Hutton to the coveted title of the 2009 European Village of Curfree Cleanliness or something) Much better than the rather hackneyed Best Wee Wee Village competition-Wee Wee being not far of the mark in this context
Paxton might like to follow suit
Labels: Berwick upon Tweed, Dog Poo, Water cannon
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
ExPat StillFat
I am trying to think what makes this resort so different to a British one. It is clean, no graffiti, no chance of vandalism, people greet you with full eye contact,everyone is polite and of course most of them speak French. Hah I said, on the beach,there are fat French women looking at a well built matron of a certain age who had rather unwisely removed her bikini top-although "topless" was hardly appropriate in her case-rubbing her reddened encyclicals she remarked to her even more bulging companion" I do so miss my Morrisons over here"
But Beg-Meil has one striking similarity to Spitall :
Dog Crap: which like the offensively small chiens Francais is everywhere- the smaller the dog the larger the sausage
And no notices threatening retribution to incontinent dog owners.
Just watch your feet.
Vive le Sport
I am trying to think what makes this resort so different to a British one. It is clean, no graffiti, no chance of vandalism, people greet you with full eye contact,everyone is polite and of course most of them speak French. Hah I said, on the beach,there are fat French women looking at a well built matron of a certain age who had rather unwisely removed her bikini top-although "topless" was hardly appropriate in her case-rubbing her reddened encyclicals she remarked to her even more bulging companion" I do so miss my Morrisons over here"
But Beg-Meil has one striking similarity to Spitall :
Dog Crap: which like the offensively small chiens Francais is everywhere- the smaller the dog the larger the sausage
And no notices threatening retribution to incontinent dog owners.
Just watch your feet.
Vive le Sport
Monday, June 23, 2008
Watch Your Step
We are awaiting with bated breath to see if the Borders Council are going to use their powers, delegated under the anti terrorism legislation to deal with serious crime in the area;as seems to be happening in some English local authorities. In our case it is believed that Fishwick Special Branch will be empowered to be the cutting age of the campaign against the dangerous scoff-laws who besmirch our proud reputation of being a very low crime region. To date there have been no reports of unmarked police cars stalking dog walkers and using high power digital cameras to collect evidence of unscooping the poop, as it were. Nor has anyone yet been held for putting the wrong kind of recycling in the white and purple bags-I have yet to check my wheelie bin for recording devices but with the advanced and miniaturised technology now in use they might be quite hard to spot.
If anyone suddenly is out of circulation for (perhaps soon to be) 42 days we will know that some thing is afoot-or in the case of dog pooh, underfoot.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Dogged does it
Apparently at a very recent meeting of a Berwickshire Community Council the question
was posed:" What happens to Dog Poo?" Presumably referring to those canine deposits lovingly wrapped in plastic bags and placed in the red containers? Some one suggested land fill sites and was then asked that if this is the case why couldn't the crap in question go into the bog standard (no pun intended) black bins and not require a special container. After all soiled nappies are acceptable in the wheelie bins
No one really knew. Hutton Think Tank's controversial Report ' Binnie the Pooh' is still at the printers and may eventually provide some answers.
Which is more than Google does although there is a link to an interesting discussion on how to stop your dog eating his own excrement.
Apparently at a very recent meeting of a Berwickshire Community Council the question
was posed:" What happens to Dog Poo?" Presumably referring to those canine deposits lovingly wrapped in plastic bags and placed in the red containers? Some one suggested land fill sites and was then asked that if this is the case why couldn't the crap in question go into the bog standard (no pun intended) black bins and not require a special container. After all soiled nappies are acceptable in the wheelie bins
No one really knew. Hutton Think Tank's controversial Report ' Binnie the Pooh' is still at the printers and may eventually provide some answers.
Which is more than Google does although there is a link to an interesting discussion on how to stop your dog eating his own excrement.
Labels: Berwickshire, Community Councils, Dog Poo
Friday, January 11, 2008
The Year of the Dog. Again
Dog Poo is already topic # One in 2008 and it is accordingly faithfully reflected* in the columns of this weeks Berwickshire
- Through your column I would like to make a plea to all the irresponsible dog owners of Eyemouth to start cleaning up after their dogs because the dog muck lying around Eyemouth is an absolute disgrace.
The areas around Seafield, Beach Avenue, St Ebba and the Nursery Lane are particularly bad, in fact the Nursery Lane is so bad that my daughter, who has children at the nursery, had to resort to printing posters and pinning them up along Nursery Lane telling owners to clean up after their dogs.
As you can imagine with three children and a buggy it is very hard to avoid stepping in it or going over it with a buggy because there is just so much of it.
I am sure every mother in the town must get sick of having to scrub buggy wheels and shoes every day after they have been out. Not to mention the serious health risks from it.
So dog owners please have some consideration for others and start cleaning up after your dog, it is not that difficult and if you find it to disgusting to pick up then you shouldn't own a dog.
Huttonian would not normally bother with a cut and paste job on such a regular crie de coeur but this strikes a particular chord with him. On our last visit to the small-house-in-Duns we were greeted by an enormous steaming sausage outside our gate. Almost impossible to avoid-and we only just did so. If this is the work of a visitor from Eyemoth please return with your owner and a large scooper but I fear it is the work of a Dirty Dog from Duns
* As this is not the Mirror-no pun intended is not warranted (blog-ed)
Dog Poo is already topic # One in 2008 and it is accordingly faithfully reflected* in the columns of this weeks Berwickshire
- Through your column I would like to make a plea to all the irresponsible dog owners of Eyemouth to start cleaning up after their dogs because the dog muck lying around Eyemouth is an absolute disgrace.
The areas around Seafield, Beach Avenue, St Ebba and the Nursery Lane are particularly bad, in fact the Nursery Lane is so bad that my daughter, who has children at the nursery, had to resort to printing posters and pinning them up along Nursery Lane telling owners to clean up after their dogs.
As you can imagine with three children and a buggy it is very hard to avoid stepping in it or going over it with a buggy because there is just so much of it.
I am sure every mother in the town must get sick of having to scrub buggy wheels and shoes every day after they have been out. Not to mention the serious health risks from it.
So dog owners please have some consideration for others and start cleaning up after your dog, it is not that difficult and if you find it to disgusting to pick up then you shouldn't own a dog.
Huttonian would not normally bother with a cut and paste job on such a regular crie de coeur but this strikes a particular chord with him. On our last visit to the small-house-in-Duns we were greeted by an enormous steaming sausage outside our gate. Almost impossible to avoid-and we only just did so. If this is the work of a visitor from Eyemoth please return with your owner and a large scooper but I fear it is the work of a Dirty Dog from Duns
* As this is not the Mirror-no pun intended is not warranted (blog-ed)
Sunday, December 09, 2007
New initiative to stamp out dog fouling
"We Bag it, tie it and bin it" is the 'Curb your Cur' slogan of the month launched by the Scottish Borders Council in yet another 'initiative' -how many has Huttonian witnessed in the last ten plus years? . Hawick and Peebles are apparently the Borders (Dog) Crap towns. The full story in the Berwickshire is as follows:
SCOTTISH Borders Council's new campaign to stamp out dog fouling was unveiled earlier this week.
The council is targeting dog owners who do not clean up after their dogs in public places and they are being told to 'Bag it, Tie it, Bin it'.
New patrols will be enforcing the law across the Scottish Borders, focusing initially on Peebles and Hawick.
"It is important that dog owners are aware of their responsibilities and clean up their dog's dirt so that no-one's health is put at risk," said Councillor Len Wyse, executive member for environmental services.
"They can dispose of it in their bin at home or in any public litter bin. Stamping out dog fouling also means everyone will be able to enjoy our public places without worrying about what mess is lurking in their way."
The Dog Fouling (Scotland) Act 2003 means that fixed penalties of £40 can be issued on the spot to people who do not clean up after their dogs.
Dr Andrew Riley, director of public health at NHS Borders, said: "We welcome and support this initiative. Apart from dog fouling being unpleasant to see and on occasion to stand in, it can also be a health hazard. Some of the illnesses it causes can be serious, so prevention is very important.
"Picking up your dog's dirt should be an everyday habit. But remember that when you have handled any animals, including dogs, it is important to wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water."
Lothian and Borders Police confirmed that, if there is sufficient evidence, owners of dogs that foul in public places who do not clean it up will face a fixed penalty notice. Alternatively, offenders will be reported to the Procurator Fiscal.
To encourage people to clean up after their dogs, the council is giving away a limited number of free dog waste bags.
They can be picked up at council contact centres and area offices.
People who have a dog fouling problem in their area can call free on 0800 376 1030 or email dogfouling@scotborders.gov.uk to report it.
More details about the campaign can be found at www.scotborders.gov.uk/dogfouling, plus a new leaflet 'Dog fouling: you and the law' has been published by the council and will be distributed widely.
The image with the article is captioned
BAG IT AND BIN IT: Izar the Border terrier with owner Andrea Shearer and friends at the launch of Scottish Borders Council’s new campaign
So now we have a canine Poo Izar to encourage his colleagues not to defecate indiscriminately and only to do so near a fully paid up bag carrying humanoid.
I am told that the headline originally read : New initiative to stamp on Dog Fouling but a sharp eyed sub got there before the press run.
A pity.
Labels: Dog Poo, Scottish Borders, Scottish Borders Council
Thursday, November 15, 2007
ALL DOGS TO BE CARRIED
Thursday morning is good news for Huttonian as the letter column of the Berwickshire can usually be relied upon to cast light on the issues which really concern Borderers. Not Mr Brown and his fears over terrorism, nor the 'occupation' of Iraq, nor even Blue Tongue or Bird Flu (although we are urged to be vigilant*) but canine poo which surely takes more column inches than any other topic. For example:
SIR, - I wish to take issue with Robert Dickson (Letters, November 1, 2007).
Whilst I also abhor, and despair at the state of our pathways, which is correctly attributed to dog excrement, what I cannot agree with are the sweeping statements, that seemingly classify all dog owners as irresponsible.
Yes there are unfortunately some dog owners that do not behave in a correct manner (I am not one of them I must say) but to intimate that if they do not look after them in public, then in his mind they cannot look after them at home, this does not follow.
Also, as for his assertion that the RSPCA or the Police should check on the way these dogs are treated, presumably at home, this statement seems to imply that he knows the offenders.
If so report them, if not, do not make such comments.
We responsibly minded dog owners have also had to cope this past year with some deranged person trying to poison our beloved pets, so I on behalf of all dog lovers, ask please, if you have a dog do the decent thing - PICK IT UP!
Indeed a novel solution. Picking up and carrying your dog will greatly increase the exercise value of your daily walk and its effleunts will full conveniently on to your palm and not foul our pristine footpaths.You will not need a nasty plastic bag as long as you have deep pockets. 'Pick it up** and pocket it' can be the new slogan for dog owners.
* One of our sparrows sneezed this morning.
** I am not sure that this is what the letter writer meant. Blog-Ed
PS this Great Dane might be a bit of a challenge?
PPS I can't resist reminding bloggees of the Kerry Man*** who when seeing a notice at the top of a London Underground escalator insisting' Dogs Must be carried' exclaimed, in despair;
'Where can I find a dog at this time of night?'
*** Yes, Yes, Yes. Politically incorrect. Racist? OK; for Kerry Man read ' a person from Paxton'
Thursday morning is good news for Huttonian as the letter column of the Berwickshire can usually be relied upon to cast light on the issues which really concern Borderers. Not Mr Brown and his fears over terrorism, nor the 'occupation' of Iraq, nor even Blue Tongue or Bird Flu (although we are urged to be vigilant*) but canine poo which surely takes more column inches than any other topic. For example:
SIR, - I wish to take issue with Robert Dickson (Letters, November 1, 2007).
Whilst I also abhor, and despair at the state of our pathways, which is correctly attributed to dog excrement, what I cannot agree with are the sweeping statements, that seemingly classify all dog owners as irresponsible.
Yes there are unfortunately some dog owners that do not behave in a correct manner (I am not one of them I must say) but to intimate that if they do not look after them in public, then in his mind they cannot look after them at home, this does not follow.
Also, as for his assertion that the RSPCA or the Police should check on the way these dogs are treated, presumably at home, this statement seems to imply that he knows the offenders.
If so report them, if not, do not make such comments.
We responsibly minded dog owners have also had to cope this past year with some deranged person trying to poison our beloved pets, so I on behalf of all dog lovers, ask please, if you have a dog do the decent thing - PICK IT UP!
Indeed a novel solution. Picking up and carrying your dog will greatly increase the exercise value of your daily walk and its effleunts will full conveniently on to your palm and not foul our pristine footpaths.You will not need a nasty plastic bag as long as you have deep pockets. 'Pick it up** and pocket it' can be the new slogan for dog owners.
* One of our sparrows sneezed this morning.
** I am not sure that this is what the letter writer meant. Blog-Ed
PS this Great Dane might be a bit of a challenge?
PPS I can't resist reminding bloggees of the Kerry Man*** who when seeing a notice at the top of a London Underground escalator insisting' Dogs Must be carried' exclaimed, in despair;
'Where can I find a dog at this time of night?'
*** Yes, Yes, Yes. Politically incorrect. Racist? OK; for Kerry Man read ' a person from Paxton'
Labels: Dog Poo, Kerry Men, Low Flying Merse
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Dogged does it
At the (fairly) recent Scottish Border council elections most candidates pledged to do more about dealing with the mountains of dog poo which besmirch our villages and sure enough a plan of action was pledged in the aims of the new administration. A 'vision' rather than a plan of action in councilspeak. This pome(?) by a local bard is seemingly based on a vision-poppy/puppy induced? Who knows. I am advised that although considered by some as possible line of action it was never actually implemented. A pity.
The Hutton Solution
‘ The Notice reads:
'Dogs who offend will be shot’
and in smaller letters:
‘Owners of offending dogs.
You have been warned!’
‘That should do the trick’
said the large man
with a baseball hat’.
putting another shell
into his shotgun.
stepping carefully over
the spent cartridges
and
the corpses
There were some dead dogs
as well.
‘I sometimes think
that the chairman
of the Community Council
takes his duties too seriously’
said
the lady with the pooper scooter
and the bullet proof
vest.
NB very carefully. The chairman of the community council thus depicted must have been well before Huttonian's time
At the (fairly) recent Scottish Border council elections most candidates pledged to do more about dealing with the mountains of dog poo which besmirch our villages and sure enough a plan of action was pledged in the aims of the new administration. A 'vision' rather than a plan of action in councilspeak. This pome(?) by a local bard is seemingly based on a vision-poppy/puppy induced? Who knows. I am advised that although considered by some as possible line of action it was never actually implemented. A pity.
The Hutton Solution
‘ The Notice reads:
'Dogs who offend will be shot’
and in smaller letters:
‘Owners of offending dogs.
You have been warned!’
‘That should do the trick’
said the large man
with a baseball hat’.
putting another shell
into his shotgun.
stepping carefully over
the spent cartridges
and
the corpses
There were some dead dogs
as well.
‘I sometimes think
that the chairman
of the Community Council
takes his duties too seriously’
said
the lady with the pooper scooter
and the bullet proof
vest.
NB very carefully. The chairman of the community council thus depicted must have been well before Huttonian's time
Labels: Dog Poo, Hutton, Local Elections, Merse
