DUNSUMONO BAY

Vox Pop in the Berwickshire

A Dinger writes

Sir,The order closing roads in Duns town centre prohibits movement in much of the centre of Duns. Included in the banned actions is walking. I live in the town centre and on one of the closed streets. It seems that my wife and I, along with many others as well as trades people and shoppers not connected with the rally will be denied access or confined to our homes.
And people complain about terror camps in Cuba!

At least no Orange Jump suit is required

Labels: BBC. Broadcasting House. Duns, Jim Clarke Rally

  ¶ 10:04 AM (4) comments

 
Un Happy Land Far Far Away

As a PS to yesterday's post Huttonian strongly recommends the article about Michael Martin's constituency where his son is the sitting MSP.

The febrile atmosphere of Westminster? Indeed; having worked many years in and out of Whitehall I can vividly remember the hothouse frenetic feverish atmosphere in which we all worked long hours but achieving what? No matter, you felt at the centre of things, 'exciting intoxocating' is right,and it used to give me a bit of a frisson to be able to say at some party in reply to the usual first question 'In the Foreign Office, actually' pursing my lips to discourage the next probing question, as if to convey, ' Her Majesty's secrets are safe with me'. Most people I met on the social round used to assume that all members of the FCO were spies and it was fun to let that thought ride, undenied. One genuine spook acquaintance when naively asked 'What exactly do you do?' used to put one finger against the side of his nose, smile enigmatically and ask the waiter for 'Another Dry Martini please-less stirred than the last'

Now deep in the Borders, my one way pad and poisoned Carnation spray handed back to Q,I feel very detached from Whitehall, Embra and even Newtown St Boswells. The Borders doesn't do politics with a big P and I doubt if many people around here have got too worked up about the expenses row, and fewer still will know or care who their Westminster MP is. Certainly they will all know the MSP, the ernegetic Mr Lamont who pops up all over the place but the Scottish Executive has a much more sensible arrangement over MSP's expenses although it can be abused as alleged when the Laird made headlines over the use of a family flat in Embra (See here for a refresher course-scroll down a bit)

Mind you if we were suddenly ethnically cleansed and transported at gun point to Martin and Son land as described in the Scottish Review we might feel a bit differently about goings on in the capital

Some one being asked, this morning, in Nairns about voting in the forthcoming European Parliamentary Elections replied 'What Elections are those?' -he may have been tempted to add 'What Parliament?' but was suddenly distracted by the sight of the Jim Clarke Rally Official Event Programme. 'Closing all those bloody road, Effing inconvenient'

Now that really matters

(Does anyone know what the image is? Not Farmer C's latest Tweed Side Pad. I thought not)

Labels: Glasga, Jim Clarke Rally, Speaker Martin Expenses, Spooks, the Laird

  ¶ 9:40 AM (3) comments

 
The roar of Boy racers is heard in the land- hearing the second Cuckoo you might say- as Tout Berwickshire girds itself up (or leaves the County) for the Jim Clarke Rally. Huttonian and the wife are in the leaving the county-actually country- category and will have to rise at Sparrowfart to get away before the Rally kicks off-or revs up-in the early hours of Friday morning. As you will see here Duns will be closed to the outside non racing world for most of Friday and Saturday and it is a holiday week end to boot (npi)Having endured two Rallies-in Hutton-we will be very happy to escape the epicentre for a brief visit to Norn Iron. The eye of a hurricane is usually calm and quiet-neither epithet will apply to central Duns this coming week end.

Up to then we will watch the rear view mirror for the hyper Boy Racers, keep out of the single track roads in the Lammermuirs where they will be showing off their skills with total disregard of their own safety

and anyone else's

(Thankyou Mr Craig of Flickr for this image from the 2008 Rally)

Labels: Duns, Jim Clarke Rally

  ¶ 10:05 AM (4) comments

 
Somewhere else in loo

Those of the frequently cross-legged fraternity (or sorority) will be encouraged by a recent article in the Scottish Review-read here about the emergence of free comfort stations for tight bladdered and impecunious persons caught short in remoter areas of Scotland and don't want to brave a noisome and expensive public facility. In the case of Aberfeldy, apparently, public minded cafes throw open their cubicles to all in need and are no doubt rewarded by extra custom from a relieved patron-who no doubt has then to revisit the loo to get rid of the Latte he/she felt morally obliged to purchase.

Loos are thin on the ground in the Borders but then so are potential beneficiaries. No indigent and desperate coach parties descend on Hutton in search of relief.If they did and the post office happened to be open (9-12-30 Mondays and Thursdays) no problem but I doubt that the travelling post office due, possibly, to replace the present one in the village hall will be equipped with a mobile urinal (Where will the van driver/post master 'go', one wonders-bladder clenched 'til Greenlaw, perhaps?)Plenty of hedges on empty roads if all else fails. Those pensioners waiting for the post bus on a cold November morning with the wind whistling through their underwear will have to hope that it is on time and business briskly dispatched or it will be a mad dash home, pension uncashed and second class stamp less.

Mind you I can think of times when public facilities would have been useful in Hutton. Those were the two instances when the village was closed off for 5 hours during stages of the Jim Clarke Rally. Villagers were ok in the comfort stations of their own homes but there were a couple of hundred visiting rally 'groupies' scattered around the main road waiting for the 15 seconds or so that the cars actually were visible in down town Hutton. Village Hall closed, no pub, no loo in tne Church so nowhere to 'go'. Bladders must have been strong as I was not aware of behind the hedge or tree activity while I was waiting for the first lot of cars to roar by-some two hours after they had closed the roads and quarantined the village.

Now I mention it I vaguely recall somebody being rather surreptitious in the vicinity of his touring bike's saddle bag.


I hope he had removed his sandwiches first.

(The image is the Hutton Village Hall-nice loos, when open)

Labels: Border Loos, Comfort stops, Jim Clarke Rally, public toilets

  ¶ 9:11 AM (0) comments

 
Death by a Thousand Cuts

It is usually quite easy to get on the course at Duns (MPBUI).As long as you can -avoid the Cardiac Three, the lone lady from Gavinton-but she is on the course at 7am so not a problem, the Golfing Societies:those mostly English hackers enjoying the ‘Freedom of the Fairways'-half price Borders golf-ladies day, club competitions, youngsters just out of school, and casual and unexpected visitors, you should be alright. Today as we teed off, as registered, at 2.32 (230 pm was not available as the club offers 8 minute slots irrespective of who else has booked, when, and even if there is no one due in the next two hours)) we seemed to have a clear course in front of us. Bliss.

But suddenly with the abruptness of low flying aircraft the fairways were loud with the sound of motor mowers. Not your bog standard sit -on -and- green- stripe- your- chemically- enhanced- swards but massive, menacing bristling with chattering teeth, roaring, oil vapour farting monsters. Intent in cutting everything in the vicinity and Golfers were a nuisance to be ignored if not mashed underwheel. Playing one shot I had a machine emerging from behind me, heading in my direction at 40 mph – a second in front of me in line of my shot, heading towards me at 39MPH and a third cutting a neat path diagonally across my bows-45MPH with the strong following wind. Apparently 230-4 pm on a Monday is a quiet period with the morning players snoozing in the club house, the cardiac three in intensive care around the bar and the ladies not due out until 5ish. So the quiet period is rapidly converted into a hideously noisy one. Occasionally, very occasionally, the courtesies would be observed and the laughing cavaliers would , rein back their steeds to allow you to take your shot but exhibiting great impatience, revving their 160 bhp engines, dreaming of the Jim Clarke Rally, which one of them may well have won over the weekend in his souped up
yellow striped,balloon tyred mower.

As suddenly as they had come they disappeared. Tea beckoned. Too late for my partner whose nerve was broken and he walked in, to keep an appointment, leaving the course to silence and to me I was just addressing an important shot when suddenly a roar to my left. No not the return of the Gnarled Old Greenkeeper on his mower, but an uncertified idjit in adjoining garden on his adolescent apparatus mowing an already scalped lawn. His start up coincided with my down swing which jerked out of its usual perfect parabola propelled my Titleist 4 into the rain forest to the right of the fairway. I told him what I thought of him in no uncertain terms-but over the roar of his 4.5 litres he heard not a word

But if he can lip read : Sir be assured

I really mean every word about you and your unmarried parents.

(Image is of mower free 12th hole)

Labels: Duns Golf, Jim Clarke Rally, Motor Mowers

  ¶ 6:00 PM (2) comments